Broken heart and baby shower

So God has really broken my heart lately. It seems like I want to cry about everything. I could just cry at any moment, especially when I think about Hungary. I miss it. But I know we are supposed to be here right now. The other day I was convicted by not being bold enough for Jesus. I was talking to someone about Hungary and mentioning something about the culture. The person said, "I wonder why that is?" And my response was "I don't know." But the truth is that I do know. It's because Jesus is not their Lord. That is the answer. So why was I not bold enough to say that? Was I afraid of offending anyone? So what if I did! So I repented and cried into my pillow the other night. I have also cried a lot inside and out because of the Holocaust. We have watched so many movies about it since January. We lived in a place where thousands of people were actually killed. I saw the shoes that line the Danube in Budapest. My heart is just broken that it happened! No telling the many many stories we have not heard about. It really was not even that long ago that it happened! This life is just so precious, and to see such evil in the world disgusts me and makes me run to God that much more. But what would we expect out of the world? It's the world! Just like we should not put Christian standards on non-Christians and judge them. We need to love people. All too often Christians get puffed up and self-righteous like their sin is "nowhere near as bad as that person's." All God wants us to do is lead people to him. In my opinion, it is not our job to "fix" people's lives. Once people read the Bible, God will begin to work on their hearts. We are to love them and show them compassion. I'm tired. I think people have a misunderstanding of what Christianity is because we (imperfect humans) have complicated it!

On another note, I had a really good weekend spending time with my husband's siblings (minus Aaron) and their spouses. We showed them the house that we should close on soon. On Sunday I helped with a baby shower for a dear friend. I was sitting by the pool and got the idea to write a poem for her and her baby. I sat down to write it and then came up with the idea to make it acrostic to spell out the baby's name. We had a good time at the shower, and I enjoyed having some girl time and catching up with some old, dear friends. Moms just need to re-fuel like that sometimes. I don't have a photo bc my camera's new memory card did not cooperate. What's funny is that at the baby shower I was talking about my sister who is due about the same time as my friend Joelle. And I was looking at all the girly gifts and said "My sister's having a girl. Oh I can't wait so I can spoil her." Then I was like, "did I just say that?!" My sister doesn't even know what she's having! It's funny bc I just assumed she's having a girl, and I caught myself.

Here is the poem I wrote for baby Talitha (Tal-i-tha)

The time has come for your baby girl to arrive
All the planning and waiting since you were a bride
Little fingers and toes, we’re counting the days
It’s a time to rejoice, a time to give thanks
To God our Creator who knew from the start
How this world would be changed and so would our hearts
All because of Talitha Jaine